Greetings, gang. Well it looks like we have failed to apprise you of our goings-on for two-thirds of the summer. Please accept our warmest apologies. I have just been taking it easy this summer, drinking a few beers:
I have also been quite busy, with plenty of developments and new adventures to tell you about in due time. But because football season quickly approaches and this period of sports purgatory known as June and July comes to a merciful end, I wanted to show you all my new black-and-gold-themed AFOs… Mofos.
AFO stands for “ankle foot orthotic.” They are essentially braces that keep my ankle and foot in a normal position. It is one of the many things I am doing to ensure that one day maybe I can walk unassisted. These kinds of orthotics are common for kids like me who have cerebral palsy, which I have officially been diagnosed with.
I tolerate them pretty well, and you could pretty much paint a turd black and gold, throw a fleur-de-lis on it and I’d like it. The only minor inconvenience is that I had to go up a few sizes in my shoes so that when I wear them, my feet look disproportionally larger than the rest of my body.
But you know what they say about a guy with big feet…
And as my mommy likes to say, this now makes daddy the odd man out in the leg brace department.